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| This is an Empath from the series Star Trek....I am not one of these. |
Many
people have all sorts of different trials through out their lives and they rely
on someone to help them or listen to them. Some people, who can afford it, hire
a counselor or psychologist. Others pour their emotions into a journal. Some bottle
it up and explode at people for the most miniscule of things. Or, a person
finds a friend and relies on that friend to listen to them. That’s where I come
in.
“Throughout
the trials in my life I always try to be the strong one, with a stiff upper lip
so that others can lean on me and depend on me for whatever they need. I’ve
been doing this since I was 8 years old. I don’t know why I always choose to
help others mourn and grieve rather than grieve myself.”
It was upon writing this paragraph in
the first draft of this personal reflection that I realized why I choose to
help others. I realized whom I am and what I was born to do. I was born to be empathetic,
to help people who can’t help themselves. I believe I was put on this earth to help
strengthen the weak. I believe God has given me the strength to be strong for
myself through being strong for others. The trials I face help me be more
empathetic. The trials that others face who need a shoulder to cry on or need
just some emotional support, helps me become more empathetic. Sometimes though,
it gets overwhelming. I believe when too many things are going on at once I isolate
myself from the environment surrounding me. I become numb to the waves of
emotions that the moon of people seems to be propelling on to me. I just
emotionally shut down. It is very scary and I get really depressed. But I soon
snap out of it and get back to being everyone’s counselor.
There
was one instance where I wasn’t expecting my empathetic traits to stand in the
way of my every day life; it was very much outside of my normal routine. I was
sitting at home on the couch in my living room researching a topic for debate.
I believe the topic was about something in the Middle East. When I clicked on
one website and read what the extremist thought of Christians like my self I was
angry at first, very briefly, and then I became scared and sad. Then I researched
more about extremists in the Middle East a picture popped up of a woman who had
been brutally beaten by her husband who was one of the extremists. I got really
confused. Because in the category of debate I was in you had to have cases for both
sides of the argument and you decided which one you would use with a coin toss.
Because I am such an empathetic creature I empathized with both pro and neg
cases. I became confused and nothing made sense I spun into a state of
depression because I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t just make my mind up
about which side I agree with. That was when I decided to stop doing debate
because I would go to bed crying every night because I was so confused, and
there was so much hate in the world that it was just awful and overwhelming.
That was one instance my empathy surprised me.
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